You know, one of the biggest problems with people ...

2005-11-23T00:27:00.000-07:00

You know, one of the biggest problems with people in relationships is that they really don't always know what they want. People refuse to take the time to sit down and really think about what their expectations should be. And when you don't do that, you can't really know what does and doesn't meet with your approval until you're put in the situation and decide (very often too late) that you really didn't want that. But chances are, if you had taken time to think about it ahead of time, you'd know that already.

Learning to figure out what you want and what the expectations should be is something so few people do and something so many people would benefit from. Once you set those guidelines, it is no longer a matter of good or bad as it is does or does not meet expectation.

Then the next challenge is holding out for your expectations. People get lonely and it can get tempting to settle for second or even third best. But inevitably, doing so will not be as fulfilling.

Holding out for the best match to the expectations is always best. And it becomes a much better challenge when you do find that person and you know that the time you invest is worthwhile time.

And all the other guys in the meantime? You don't feel bad about it. You can't. You know that if they don't meet the mark, you wouldn't be happy anyways. And its a great comfort to be able to know that deep inside.

Comments on Growing, Not Dying: Why Good Guys Loose Girls to the Bad Boys

You know, one of the biggest problems with people ...