Growing, Not Dying

Welcome to my insights, ponderings, and experiences. Hopefully they will enrich you in some small way, or at least make you laugh.

Monday, November 20, 2006

Spiritual Breakthroughs In a Haircut

Jim and I read Tolly Burkan book Extreme Spirituality: Radical Approaches To Awakening. It is an amazing book. Each chapter is about a different breakthrough process and what it can help you learn. Most of the breakthroughs need to be preformed with someone trained to assist and facilatate the process. One chapter is on shaving your head as a way of accepting change. After discussing it in great length, Jim and I decided to go for it. We each set our intentions. Mine was to accept change, even if it is dramatic or uncomfortable. The second part of my intention was to continue releasing judgement of others by allowing others to judge me.

This is Jim and I previously:

Jim is now bald. I cut my hair "super short," one inch to be exact. Jim helped me. We took it off in chunks. I wish now I would have taken pictures throughout the process. It was hard, but exciting at the same time. It didn't really turn gut wrenching until I got the clippers and ran the first line across the top of my head. Jim was facing me and tears swelled up in his eyes. That's when it hurt, seeing his reaction. Once we finished using the clippers on my head and I looked in the mirror.....I realized for the first time an unexpected result. I felt totally stripped of any feminine energy I had before. Suddenly I did not recognize myself. It hurt. Fortunately Jim was very loving and I got through it that night. The next day I traveled across the country to Florida to be with some amazing people at The Elite Trainer's Bootcamp- aka Camp of Miracles. By the end of the am more in touch with feeling like a woman than ever before. I am not so concerned with what others think of me and actually feel more beautiful than I did before. :)

As far as my intentions, I have definately gotten to accept change more. I feel so open to whatever life may bring my way right now. As for judgements, when I started paying more attention I found most people didn't even care. Those who were passing judgement, it didn't bother me. It really is all about them. I know this because their feelings change based on the story they are making up as to why my hair might be so short: gay, cancer, supporting someone, cult member, etc. The truth is 'why' doesn't change that my hair is just shorter and that does not change who I am inside!


Anonymous Amy O said...

Dawn, that is incredible! Seriously. I wish I had the bravery to do something so tangable to progress. I'm so terrified of change. I would love to learn to accept it and be open to it. And what you said about judging others and others judging you... well, I really struggle with that as well. I want so much to change that part of me. You give me the inspiration to try. Thanks dear. And by the way, I think short hair is very becoming on you. Seriously. :-)

Love ya!


Tue Nov 28, 04:05:00 AM MST  
Anonymous Marcos said...

I stop reading for a bit, and look what I miss!

Not that I might mean a whole lot coming from me, but I'm proud of you. It's an awesome thing you're doing. :-)

Thu Dec 28, 09:30:00 AM MST  
Anonymous Cielito said...

What I learned from this Dawn is that I easily and happily change all the time--because I don't check in with anyone. What a greater challenge to be conscious of my actions on loved ones. I'm asleep at the wheel about that and it makes me sad. My intention is to have more awareness of my impact on others.

Fri Jan 12, 11:49:00 PM MST  

Post a Comment

<< Home