Growing, Not Dying

Welcome to my insights, ponderings, and experiences. Hopefully they will enrich you in some small way, or at least make you laugh.

Monday, August 21, 2006

Lessons from Kindergarten

My second son started Kindergarten 2 weeks ago. It has been rough on him. All these new rules. After only 3 days he came home with his first discipline slip for talking and playnig during snack time. He's a really social guy so not talking is tough on him.

Last week he didn't get his snack a couple times because he took too long on his seatwork. We talked and agreed he was going to do better.

Today he came home so upset. He was close to tears and lashing out at his siter to vent. It was time for a heart-to-heart.

"Hey, Bud. You seem really upset. What happened at school today?"

He blinked back tears and his anger boiled as he told me, "I didn't get my snack 'cause I raised my hand and the teacher didn't see me and come check my work in time."

"Why didn't you call out to the teacher and ask her to come over?"

"We're not allowed to talk! We're suppose to raise our hands!" he practically yelled at me.

Poor boy. He's trying so hard to do it all the right way and he still doesn't get his snack.

How often do we feel like this? We are so excited to do something new, start a new part of our life, begin an adventure, only to get started and find there are a bunch of new rules or skills we have to learn. We start doing our best but we keep getting corrections, being denyied the goal we are going after. We get frustrated. Sometimes we take it out on those around us. We feel like we are doing our best to "do it right" and we still don't see the results we expected. How is this fun?

"Well, son, did you talk to your teacher about this?"

Frustrated, "no."

"Tommorrow can you go to her and say, 'Yesterday, I raised my hand and I didn't get my snack. It made me really made. What can we do to make this work?"

We practiced a few times. I sincerely hope it helps him. If not, I may end going down to the school and taking the kid his snack on my own. He's really doing his best and that deserves a reward.

(His Dad said he gets to pick dinner tonight. He was really torn between cold cereal or Burger King. It's looking like burgers at this point.)

Perhaps this too is a lesson. He did not get his grahm cracker at snack time, but now he gets to go out for dinner. I promise you, given the choice, he would take burgers over crackers any day! Sometimes we don't get what we want when we want it from the Universe because it is busy sending us something better!

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